denial painted

Eyes and tears painted red
a letter in a hand
unread
Doubts and pain painted black
Fear too painted blue
a message unread in a wooden box
left there to become dust
a thousand wishes were wished to be true
not everything you want
comes to you .

an unsent letter to you my love :

dear love
dearest love
my love :
                   Do you know how much I love you, how many times aday I think of you ?
every time I talk , walk , work or eat . you are always there . you are the first thought think of when I wake and the last thought in my head when I sleep , even my dreams , you occupied them all .
Do you know how much I miss you  , how much I long for you ?
I wish if I could lock you in my heart. call me possessive , I don't care .
I want you to be mine forever , we can't be separated, you are a part of me now. I can't live without you , maybe I can but what kind of life would that be ? I know I would become numb with nothing to feel , I would never be happy , I would never be the same . my heart would be deeply wounded and even if it healed , it would leave a scar . a scar that time can't erase , a scar engraved on my soul .
I pray we always remain together , till death do us apart .
                                                                                            

                                                                                            yours, the always faithful .
                                                                                                                                      

If I could go back in time

Regret is something new to me . I can't remember that I've ever regretted doing anything before, even if it had bad consequences , I took responsibility for it . the damage was only to me and no one got hurt , but now I know regret and it's awful especially when it concerns someone and not just anyone  , someone you love , someone you never wanted to hurt . maybe regret is new to me because love is new to me .