denial painted

Eyes and tears painted red
a letter in a hand
unread
Doubts and pain painted black
Fear too painted blue
a message unread in a wooden box
left there to become dust
a thousand wishes were wished to be true
not everything you want
comes to you .

an unsent letter to you my love :

dear love
dearest love
my love :
                   Do you know how much I love you, how many times aday I think of you ?
every time I talk , walk , work or eat . you are always there . you are the first thought think of when I wake and the last thought in my head when I sleep , even my dreams , you occupied them all .
Do you know how much I miss you  , how much I long for you ?
I wish if I could lock you in my heart. call me possessive , I don't care .
I want you to be mine forever , we can't be separated, you are a part of me now. I can't live without you , maybe I can but what kind of life would that be ? I know I would become numb with nothing to feel , I would never be happy , I would never be the same . my heart would be deeply wounded and even if it healed , it would leave a scar . a scar that time can't erase , a scar engraved on my soul .
I pray we always remain together , till death do us apart .
                                                                                            

                                                                                            yours, the always faithful .
                                                                                                                                      

If I could go back in time

Regret is something new to me . I can't remember that I've ever regretted doing anything before, even if it had bad consequences , I took responsibility for it . the damage was only to me and no one got hurt , but now I know regret and it's awful especially when it concerns someone and not just anyone  , someone you love , someone you never wanted to hurt . maybe regret is new to me because love is new to me .

our lives in an hourglass

Today we are alive
tomorrow we are forgotten
we live by an hourglass
under the veil of full trust
that time is ours and we shall not be dust
that tomorrow is coming just to feed our lust
but the sand is slipping grain by grain
emptying our souls till we are fully drained

long story made short

I take it all into my depth
there's nothing else left to be said
my heart can bear more than I guessed
there is nothing more for me to be felt .

those hazel eyes

I made a promise not to cry
since then my tears are dry
I keep my sadness inside of me
it piles up as much as it can be
I watch in silence
the bloody rays of the wounded sun
I wait in patience
for the starry nights that are yet to come
hazel eyes with locked up tears
eyes didn't cry for too many years

Zoolander

Derek zoolander :

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?

Embarrassed

Let's just say that today was one of those days when I really really really wanted to shoot myself with a Mac10 , burn my body and blow the ashes in the air .